Soft Ginger Cookies

 

I’ve gone back and forth over the past few months about whether or not I should share with you that I was in treatment for triple negative breast cancer.  I was diagnosed last September, and it was a bit of a shock.  I weaned my son for it, and we have to put having another baby on hold because of it, and that has been hard.  Cancer, of course, sucks no matter who you are, where you have it, or how old you are.  It is a game changer.  Something that happens to nice people and to mean people and to everyone in between.  You can easily go down the rabbit hole of asking why.  Was it that trip to X or Y?  Too much of Z?  Not enough exercise?  Holding on to things instead of letting go? 

Eventually (maybe), you just realize that asking the why isn’t going to get you to where you want to be, and you move on to getting through it.  Figuring out what day after chemo you start to feel better and looking forward to that.  Learning how to quickly (and correctly!) put on your wig so that you can make it to work with the appropriate amount of forehead showing.  Laughing that your toddler commandeered (and still sleeps with) the homemade arm pillow that was a gift from your surgeon to help relieve pain from having a few lymph nodes removed.  Learning to love your port because it means that you don’t have to sit there for hours with a needle in your arm.  Being glad that they can give you a different drug to make sure you won’t have nausea.  Realizing that if you are good to yourself the symptoms might pass a little quicker.  Recognizing that it really is amazing that they can target the radiation so well that you end up with a perfectly sunburned box that surrounds your breast.  Knowing that PT and acupuncture help facilitate your healing.  Sure, there are days where you are angry, sad, and so terribly tired of going through it.  And then one day you wake up and realize that even though you’re going through something that is terrible, you’re still the happiest you’ve ever been because your husband is amazing, your toddler loves you and wants to kiss your newly growing hair, you’re surrounded by wonderful people, and you really want for nothing.  Cancer changes everything and yet it changes nothing.  You’re still you, and you’re more than just cancer.  Just now it might be easier to appreciate the things you do have.  Of course, this is just my experience.  Cancer is different for each person it touches.

Last week I finished up my treatments, and I’m filled with relief to be starting my healing, but it is a tentative feeling.  Even though the treatments have ended, the fear is still there.  I’ll be waiting and watching.  My hope is that eventually, this will just be something that happened as opposed to something that defines my days.  Who knows what the next few years will bring.  I’m not really ok with not knowing, but it is something I’m willing to learn to live with.  For now, I will just say that I am grateful.  Grateful that I felt the lump, grateful that Scott encouraged me to go to the doctor, grateful for the love, support, and help my parents provided, grateful for all of the people who treated me (and continue to do so), and for those who helped us along the way with meals, Pink Team messages, a beautiful handmade quilt, random treats, wig tips, kind words and inquiries about my health, chemo gifts, pictures, exercise plans, balloons, flowers, cards, birthday party help, and everything else.  Your support made our experience the best it could be.  Thank you.

PS:  Now to the part that you really thought you were going to get when you opened up this post.  These cookies are fantastic, and I highly encourage you to make them!  They are soft and warm and are everything a ginger cookie should be.  Cookies can't fix everything, but they do make the world a better place. 

Notes:
These cookies are perfect for when you only have a few minutes to devote to baking a day.  You can mix the dough up one day and then bake it the following day.  Alternatively, if you want to do it all in one day, make sure you save enough time to chill the dough for about an hour before you bake it.  I grated the fresh ginger with a microplane.  The chilled dough is quite firm, so you may find it easier to scoop it out into tablespoon-sized balls before it is chilled.  (I scooped it when it was chilled, and it took a lot more effort than I thought it would).  I coated these in granulated sugar, but you could roll them in a more coarsely-ground or sanding sugar for a different look.  To coat them, I dumped some sugar in a large Ziplock bag and then added 3-4 dough balls, shook them for a few seconds until they were coated, and then transferred them to the baking sheet.  It is so much easier than taking the time to roll each ball in a bowl of sugar.  These cookies freeze really well. 

Adapted from The King Arthur Flour Cookie Companion:  The Essential Cookie Cookbook

Ingredients:
½ cup (103 g) crystallized ginger
½ cup (102 g) granulated sugar
½ cup (98 g) dark brown sugar
3½ cups (506 g) all-purpose flour
2¼ teaspoons (13 g) baking soda
1 teaspoon (8 g) salt
1¾ teaspoon (3 g) ground cinnamon
1¼ teaspoon (3 g) ground cloves
½ teaspoon (1 g) ground cardamom
¾ teaspoon (2 g) ground ginger
1 cup (226 g) unsalted butter, room temperature
⅓ cup (92 g) molasses
2 teaspoons vanilla extract
½ tablespoon (9 g) grated fresh ginger
2 eggs
Extra granulated sugar for coating

Yields about 4 dozen cookies

Pulse, Whisk, Beat, Scoop, Chill:
Put the candied ginger, granulated sugar, and brown sugar in a food processor, and pulse until the ginger is finely ground and incorporated into the sugar.  Set aside.  In a separate medium-sized  bowl, whisk together the flour, baking soda, salt, ground cinnamon, ground cloves, ground cardamom, and ground ginger, and set aside.  In a separate bowl, cream the butter with the sugar and candied ginger mixture.  Once the mixture is light, add in the molasses, vanilla, and fresh grated ginger and beat until incorporated.  Add the eggs one at a time, beating until incorporated.  Add the flour in halves, and beat until no more streaks remain.  Chill for at least an hour, or overnight, and then bake.  It will make your job easier if you go ahead and scoop the dough into tablespoon-sized balls onto a wax paper-covered cookie sheet before chilling.

Coat and Bake:
Adjust the oven racks to the upper and lower thirds of the oven, and preheat it to 350ºF.  Cover your cookie sheets with parchment paper or Silpat mats.  If you haven’t already, scoop the chilled dough into tablespoon-sized balls.  Pour some granulated sugar into a bag, add a few dough balls, and shake until the dough is coated.  Place the coated cookies on the prepared baking sheets.  Repeat until all cookies are coated.  Bake at 350ºF for for 8-10 minutes until they are set looking and very lightly browned on the bottom.  Allow the cookies to rest on the cookie sheet for 10 minutes and then transfer to a rack to continue cooling.  Store cookies in an airtight container at room temperature or in the freezer.

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